Doing Something
November 13, 2001

by Joe Sobran

     In order to combat terrorism, our government is 
cracking down on the usual suspects: us. As I was 
reminded last week, we are all suspected terrorists now, 
subject to insulting and invasive searches at airports.

     At Dulles Airport I somehow set off an alarm, even 
after removing every key, pen, coin, and paper clip from 
my pockets. I had to stand with my legs spread and arms 
extended while a gent with a turban and a bushy beard 
checked hitherto private sections of my person with a 
metal detector. He was quite polite, but I couldn't help 
reflecting to myself that he looked a bit more, well, 
exotic than I did. If such indignities become a routine 
part of air travel, pretty soon only nudists will be 
flying.

     On my return trip I set off another alarm at O'Hare 
in Chicago. Once again a spread-eagle search failed to 
detect any deadly weapons, but this time the contents of 
my pockets moved the authorities to spring into action. A 
young official announced to me that he was confiscating 
two of the three cigarette lighters I was carrying. It 
seems there is a new Federal rule that you may carry only 
one lighter aboard an airplane.

     I decided not to bring O'Hare to a halt by demanding 
an explanation of this novel rule. But I tried in vain to 
think of a reason. It seemed to me, and still does, that 
if you can hijack a plane with a cigarette lighter, one 
would be enough, and there would be no great advantage in 
having a second or third lighter. I can't really explain 
why I happened to have so many lighters on me -- my 
pockets are always full of unsorted stuff -- but I've 
never lit two of them at the same time, and I don't know 
how I'd go about lighting three of them at once. But 
maybe these cunning hijackers have some tricks I haven't 
heard of.

     Anyway, the Federal Government seized two of my 
cigarette lighters without even offering compensation. 
I'd broken a rule I'd never heard of and can't 
understand, and I paid the price. This is how we live 
now. Do you feel safer?

     I suppose the real purpose of these measures is to 
make us feel that the government is "doing something" 
about terrorism, even if what it does has no discernible 
relation to addressing the problem. The pettier the 
precaution, the greater the vigilance.

     Is this also the purpose of the war on Afghanistan 
-- to convince us that the government is "doing 
something"? We are assured that the war is going well, 
that raining bombs on a godforsaken country is somehow 
having an impact on terrorism -- though the terrorists we 
have to worry about are already living here, know what to 
do, and presumably don't need to be activated by orders 
from a cave in Asia.

     Who cares? When it's feelings that count, dropping 
bombs is an emotional release. Whether they achieve their 
stated goal is secondary. Some people who feel very 
strongly want to use nuclear weapons. That would really 
be "doing something."

     Ordinary Americans feel that they are "doing 
something" by waving flags signifying their support for 
the government, or "the country." Some people seem to 
think they prove their own patriotism by impugning that 
of others; radio talk-show hosts display their patriotism 
by accusing the news media of lacking it, as if Peter 
Jennings were rooting for Osama bin Laden.

     What it really comes to is that nobody knows what to 
do. We are faced not with a war in the usual sense, but 
with an extremely nasty sort of vandalism. It can't 
conquer us, but maybe, because of its diffuse nature, we 
can't conquer it either. We aren't dealing with Hirohito, 
let alone Robert E. Lee. There will be no conclusive 
Appomattox moment when the enemy surrenders his sword and 
we know it's finally over. It can go on until the last 
fanatic decides to devote his remaining years to 
collecting stamps.

     And in the meantime, the government will keep 
cracking down on the usual suspects.

     We all want desperately to return to the world we 
thought we were living in on September 10. But this 
desire may be a utopian yearning. That world no longer 
exists and may never exist again.

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